If You Have To Do “Black Friday,” We’ve Got A Better Way

A “Buy This, Not That” article.

 

Some words and phrases lose their meaning over time. Sometimes that’s through actual physical repetition—try saying the word “surreptitiously” 20 times and see if it still sounds like English at the end. Other times it is because the word themselves become less precise, or stop meaning what they used to mean. Words like “metrosexual” or “mansplain” lost their meaning over time because they were being used to describe things that didn’t fit, or because people misused them, or just because people are weird. I feel like “Black Friday” has joined that category.

Black Friday used to mean three things:

  1. Getting up at 4 AM the day after Thanksgiving to shop for cheap things that you really want.
  2. A singular day of sales.
  3. Newscasters showing footage of seething masses of frantic humans losing their goddamn minds in a Target.

And now it means… not those things. Well, it still means the last thing. I don’t know what newscasters would do without footage of Black Friday “riots.” They might have to actually report the news. Heaven forbid.

But the meaning of Black Friday has started to change dramatically.

The onset of e-commerce meant that we spread into Cyber Monday. Then the fear of big businesses encouraged Small Business Saturday. And then nonprofits were like “we want in on this action” and started Giving Tuesday. Then the day itself started to stretch. First it was starting at midnight on Thanksgiving. Then…. six PM on Thanksgiving? Then pretty much all of Thanksgiving. And now the sales are just basically all of November. Just this evening, I got an ad for a “pre-Black Friday” sale at Office Depot. Office Depot.

And the “cheap things that you really want” thing changed as well. Black Friday sales are often “sales” in the way that garage sales are “sales”: they are opportunities to get rid of shit that the owners don’t want and hope you are stupid enough to take. It’s a way to empty out stock before the heart of Christmas shopping.  And the “cheap” thing is a lie these days, too. Oftentimes the “sale” is the same price that the object already is, but with a new label on it. Last time I partook in Black Friday, I was very pleased to get a copy of Apples to Apples for $15. The next week I saw it in the store for… $10. The hell.

So all of that adds up to one thing: Black Friday is bullshit. It is extra bullshit now, because of that aforementioned time creep. Because capitalism is always gonna capitalism, low-wage workers are being forced to leave their Thanksgiving celebrations early, or miss their Thanksgiving celebrations entirely, so that people who don’t realize that the internet exists can get $5 off of a flat-screen TV. It is bullshit.

So don’t do it. Don’t go out on Black Friday. Don’t give more money to Bezos or the Waltons. Instead, if you want to spend money, buy things from smaller artisans and creators. Like the ones I’m about to show you!

Each of these artists has either made something that is hanging up in my house at this very moment, or was recommended to me by a friend. So they all are beloved by people with excellent taste. Also, all images are the copyrighted property of their creators — I’m just borrowing them temporarily to show you all how cool they are.

And heads up: their sites or shops are hyperlinked in their names.

 

Meghan Rowswell

I’m not 100% sure that there is an art style that Meghan Rowswell doesn’t do. She makes gorgeous ikebana arrangements, crazy cool egg decoration things, textile sculptures, and collages. She honestly does more than that, but if I keep listing her accomplishments, I’m going to start feeling lame about my lack thereof. So instead I’ll just show you one of my favorite pieces, a collage she did. Her site doesn’t have anything currently on sale, but I have it on good authority that if you e-mail her you can totally work out a commission. (This “good authority” comes from having, you know, done that.)

 

The Latest Kate

The Latest Kate is an artist who makes really adorable posters of animals with encouraging sayings on them. LOOK AT THIS MAJESTIC SPACE DEER. The space deer is reminding you that you’re a badass. Thank you, space deer. I am, in fact, a badass.

 

 

CarnivalSix

I need to have about sixteen more children in my life than I do, because I need to buy all of them these adorable fairytale prints from CarnivalSix. They’re all really cute interpretations of classic stories, with key quotes from the story featured as part of the story. The genius behind CarnivalSix, Laurel Shelley-Reuss, is also the co-creator of a fantastic RPG-based comic called The Handbook of Heroes. It also has a Patreon. (Hint, hint.)

 

Emily McDowell

Emily McDowell creates a variety of products, including cards, mugs, and stationary. My favorites are her cards, which are quite outside your average Hallmark, in that they admit that sympathy cards are a fruitless attempt to make people feel better when they can’t be made to feel better. Or give genuine congratulations for a new baby.

 

 

Tea and Absinthe

Tea and Absinthe makes tea, teaware, and other drinkware. It’s all pretty fantastic, but my favorite is this dapper octopus mixer. He has a hat.

 

Kevin Eslinger

Kevin Eslinger makes original art as well as fanart. Because I’m a geek, I’m especially fond of the fanart, especially his splatter-style of fanart. Like this amazing splatter Venom, which seems to really capture all of the messy “WTF-ness” of Venom.

 

Karen Hallion

Hi, my name is Elle, and I’m an addict. It’s been… well like one month since I bought a Karen Hallion piece. I have a problem. Karen Hallion is at the perfect intersection for me of fanart, feminism, art nouveau, and general fun. I have So Many Karen Hallion prints. Like, All. All the Prints. It’s a problem. I’m running out of wall. But one that I definitely have is this one, because it is AMAZING. It is art noveau Spider-Gwen. ART NOVEAU SPIDER-GWEN.

 

Flying Frog Illustration

Flying Frog Illustration does really gorgeous watercolors, both originals and fanart. I have a few of their pieces, but my absolute favorite has to be this piece of the Endless from Neil Gaiman’s Sandman. I’m already a sucker for these characters, especially all together like this, but what I’m blown away by is the color and complexity. Most fanart I’ve seen of the Endless tends towards the minimalist, and this is anything but. This is the Endless as seen by Delirium, and I love it.

 

Megan Lara

So the art nouveau thing… it’s happening again. Megan Lara has great original art and fanart, but the pieces that I collect the most are her art nouveau depictions of badass female characters. It is really hard to choose a favorite—Peggy Carter, Princess Leia, and Wonder Woman all hang in their art nouveau glory on my wall. But the centerpiece of my collection has to be this amazing depiction of Shuri. The colors and the details are just so epic, and Shuri herself is so fantastic.

 

C Wilson Art

C Wilson Art specializes in fanart combined with classic styles, like amazing military portraits of Star Wars characters. My absolute favorite, however, has to be this “Creation of Adam” parody starring Cthulhu and the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I love it so, so much. So much.

 

 

Leanne Huynh

Leanne Huynh does a lot of amazing original art as well as fanart, and it’s really hard to pick a favorite. But I will probably have to go with this piece of a baby Eeyore, because it is basically the only thing in the world that can make my ovaries clench like I want a child. I don’t actually want a child, I just want to give a child this adorable picture of baby Eeyore. It is that cute.

 

 

MJ Erickson

MJ Erickson does fanart, original art, and also makes pins. Most of the pieces that I actually own aren’t currently up on her site, but I dug through the interwebs to find my favorite, this print of Valkyrie raining down holy hell. Look at this piece. Look closelier. Look more closelier. It’s freaking amazing. And even cooler, Valkyrie herself, Tessa Thompson, saw the pic and gave it her seal of approval.

 

Atomic Pixies

I mentioned that I like art nouveau, right? Well guess what, here is more! Atomic Pixies does really cute art nouveau pop culture pieces. They have an entire series of RuPaul’s Drag Race contestants in art nouveau style and with one of their famous catchphrases. I wanna collect them all, like Pokémon cards.

 

Chrissie Zullo

Chrissie Zullo also does both original art and fanart (sensing another trend?) She has lots of way cool pieces, but the one that I have hanging up in my kitchen is the best, in my opinion—a coffin-shaped pic of a vampire bobby soxer at a death-themed soda fountain. Like, how do you even come up with that? And look at how adorable she is, drinking that refreshing bottle of blood! She has the bat equivalent of a poodle skirt! What’s not to love?

 

Twilight Garden Shop

Twilight Garden Shop makes artisan bath products that look very scrumptious. Literally. Like I would totally be tempted to eat this soap. It’s like what happens when a geode and taffy have a baby.

 

Sweet Pickles’ Designs

Sweet Pickles’ Designs makes pet accessories that are just too adorable. Like this adorable spooky pet bow tie.

 

That’s just a sampling of my very favorites. I encourage you all to show them love (and by love, I mean both praise them and give them money). But there are also literally thousands and millions more artists out there who could use your support and admiration. And you can give it to them without even fully waking from your turkey coma, without making some poor person making $8.00 an hour venture into the cold to get screamed at by someone who has officially spent way too much time with their family and has to take it out on someone, and without making any mega billionaires any more ridiculously wealthy. So win-win, right?

Signed: Feminist Fury

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Featured image shows a storefront from the inside with two naked mannequins looking out. The glass has “50% off” posters stuck to it. It was taken by Kecko and is released under a CC-BY-2.0 license.

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